The Eastward Boulevard
by San-of-the-forest
Summary: The Guild was home to hundreds. From orphaned children to lost men, it was always a place to call home. But the home is no more. A man who loved the guild woke one day to it's ruins. The bomb residue and soot still covered his hands despite his pleads he didn't destroy his home. But his home is gone. And now he is going down The Eastward Boulevard. Elfman and Evergreen. Elfever.
1. Chapter 1

_Drip, drip...Drip._

The last unsatisfactory drip rolled off the lucid folds of the umbrella. The sky is crying softly. I wish it would cry harder for me. I hate to cry so perhaps it can take my share of tears. But it looks like nothing is giving today even after so much has been taken away. Among the sky's tears there is no noise besides the rumble of the cars drifting by. My lungs cramp and I cough quietly into my hand. That poison still sat in my lungs despite Porlyusica injecting us with the blood of Tempest. The dark flecks in my spit remind me that while it can't kill me, I'm still going to be coughing that demon out for days. Coughing, rain and cars driving away. All are perfect and sad noises this evening. Even the clouds, a simple dark gray makes this evening oddly somber and quiet between noises. Everything is either gray or black it seems. From the sky to the city to even me. _I wish the sky would cry more. I wish someone would cry for me._

The rain patters against my damp umbrella again even under a roof ledge and I begin to wonder where my closest friends are. Freed no doubt will be organizing all his sabers and pens into their elegant boxes. Bickslow, no doubt will be taking his dolls on a stroll through the park. One last haunt before they leave for god knows how long. And Laxus...Hell, I've known Laxus for years and still can't guess the guy. Laxus took the ruin of his home better than I expected. Maybe because he is hardly there anymore he no longer sees it as his home. At least I think so...I wonder what I should be thinking or feeling. I feel confused and perhaps I should. I feel angry and I'm sure I should. But I mainly feel lost which makes me feel uncertain, and I know I should. But I have my family. We are one of the few groups staying together after the death of our home, that makes me grateful. The evening begins to stretch into night, and I know my family will be arriving here soon to depart Magnolia. It is one of the few times I have ever been early. It is my own little private goodbye to this city. And my destroyed home. A car swished past and splattered water against the path where my feet stood proudly. Is that soot in the water? It is hard to tell against all the gray and black. The umbrella closed almost sadly above my head yielding the spattering rain to my face and my glasses. I smell it in the air, the harsh smell of soot and ash. It mingles in with the smell of rain and wet cobble stones. Again it is quite fitting. I cough again into my hand and shake the black flecked mess away. The rain washes down my hair and face freely as I step out from under the roof. They should be here soon. And it almost seems as if the sky is crying harder, maybe now it is crying for me. I turn to look down the street, just instinctively. But maybe I was meant to, and perhaps the sky isn't crying for me but him. A large looming figure steps out from a dark ally towards the east gate, the gloomy wet street lights catching his hair. Even wet it looked like snow. I observe him silently as he adjusted his duffel bag on his shoulder under the street light. I can't make his expression. He shrugs his shoulders and looks up into the street light above him. I wonder what it is he is looking for. And then he looks at me. I wasn't hiding from him, nor was I making my presence known. And yet as soon as he sees me he freezes up and almost looks as if he is going to back away. We stay like that. A silent showdown, the person to act first loses. But he doesn't back away. He found some nugget of bravery in him and squared his broad shoulders under the light and reluctantly approached me. I've debated what I should feel after finding myself homeless, and know I debate what I should feel seeing him. I felt angry. Angry that he let a demon posses him, angry that he turned my home into a desolation. But it is all his fault...

And then he steps closer, and in the gray and black light of night I see his eyes. They were once blue but now a deep gray in the light, but I also saw sorrow. And anger of his own. But I don't think it was for me...

"I didn't think anyone would be here" he muttered and shouldered his wet bag. It is true. The east gate is the closest to Fairy Tail. The closest to the wreckage and doom of it, people now avoid it for good reason.

"Neither did we" even to me my voice sounds harsh. He almost winces.

"So...So your waiting for them?" he asks. I think it is perfectly obvious and grit my teeth.

"Yeah, who else?"

He just nods. A sad slow nod and I can see he probably wanted this least of all. Its when he glances behind him. Behind him where the black rubble stood out starkly against the gloomy gray street light. That's when I think I should feel maybe something else than anger. "Do you hate me, Ever?" he asks again quietly. It almost seems like speaking above a quiet mutter is illegal.

I pause. Perhaps a pause is all it took. The courage in his shoulders slumped, his eyes decided too look at his feet. But I don't hate him. I never have. "I don't".

"Okay...That's okay" he nods. "What about the others? Have they...Have they asked about me?"

In the final days before Fairy Tail disbanded, Elfman never came anywhere near where people were gathering. Mirajane made excuses for him but they weren't needed. Everyone knew why he wasn't around. If I am being honest I looked for him at the gatherings and wondered where he was. I don't think anyone else did but I didn't want to lie to him either though. "No".

"I see..." the rain has made his hair a sodden mess and it fell in his face constantly. He pushed it out halfheartedly but when it flopped back he made no effort to move it again. The rain plummeted down harder and I felt the water creep through my clothing. I made no move to raise my umbrella.

"Has anyone seen you?"

"No one" he replied. That dulled my anger. No one has tried to approach Elfman. None of his friends has tried to comfort him...I wonder where his sisters are. I almost expected to see them walk out the same ally where Elfman stalked out from. Mirajane, all elegance and grace even in the rain. Lisanna, a somber sadness always hovering around her pretty face.

"Where are they?"

"They?" he frowns and shifts his feet. That should've been enough to warn me but for some reason I pursue the question.

"They. Your sisters?" Perhaps I do feel more than anger. Perhaps a touch of sadness. But that could be the rain.

"Oh...They are not coming".

Something in me fell. It didn't fall far but I felt it all the same. "Why not? How come?"

"Ever, would you want to be with your family?" he gestured to the rubble behind him a constant reminder to him that he has made everyone he cares about homeless and lost.

"No. I guess not".

I stand in silence and finger my umbrella. The cold rain soaked through my clothes and into my bones. I wanted to lift it above me. I wanted to throw it into the street. And I wanted to lift it above him. The lack of power in his voice, the lack of that clock work phrase, and I wonder if anyone else has wondered if he is alright. He lifted his head to the crying sky above him and let the rain water wash over his face. His eyes looked more than just sad and angry. They almost looked vacant. To lift my umbrella over me would protect me and to give it to him would protect him. I couldn't do one without leaving the other, so we both will suffer the cold. Neither of us deserve it. "Where are you going to go?" he asked through the rain.

It is hard to answer. I have contemplated this question ever since I woke in our make shift infirmary. I spent nights awake wondering if the Raijinshuu will stay together, days in silence contemplating the destruction of the guild and the man behind it. Or was it a demon? I can't quite decide. "We picked a point on the compass and that is where we shall go".

"East I take it?"

"South. We decided to go through the east gate because not many people go through here. A quiet get away" I look at him harder trying to determine his motives. "Do your sisters even know you are going?"

"I told them. I thought it would be best for them if I wasn't around". I could have said that's not true but I'm not a liar. "They agreed in their own way. Though they tried to cover it up" he laughed after that but it sounded more like a choke in his throat. He sounded in pain. He didn't cry, but the rain washing down his face looked like tears. It seems the sky is crying for him after all. What would I do if I was him? Would I kick and scream? Would I try to find someone who cares? Would I try to rebuild the guild and make everything better? He may have thought of all these things. He may have even tried to do them. But maybe what stopped him is that no one seemed to care. My friends shouldn't be too far away now.

"Who else have you said goodbye to?" I already knew the answer.

"No one. I didn't think anyone would want to see me".

"I could tell. You looked like you were going to run away from me" I wanted it to be a joke. But it came out sad and pinched.

He paused and stared at the gate. All empty and dark in the evening. He gestured to it like he was gesturing to an old friend. "I already am. But from everyone".

"Do you want to go?" He nodded, sad and stiff, I wonder how much bravery it takes to stand in front of me and in front of this ruin. We stand quiet for a few seconds but he looks at me soon. Slowly and cautiously he looks at me.

"You should really use your umbrella".

"It wouldn't seem fair if I did" I said and smiled at him. He looked as if he would smile back but it seemed as if his face wouldn't work properly for him. Giving up the pretense of a smile he took a step towards the gate.

"I really should be going...". My heart fell a little further and I wondered if I wanted him to go. If I wanted him to stay...

"Where are you going to go?" I ask quietly. I could hardly hear my voice above the rain but he must've or just decided to tell me anyway.

"East. I don't know where, but away from here. Away from this" he gestured without looking at the guild's rubble.

"So even your sisters don't know where you are going..." I mutter and and push my wet hair out of my face. "Aren't you going to be lonely?"

He turns back and looks at me and there is something in his eyes. Sadness and pain, but something else. Something I couldn't quite put my finger on. It made me sad, it made me want to walk up and ask him if he really is alright. To tell him not to go east. But I didn't and he gave me a smile. A sad almost forced smile. "I don't think it really matters". But I think it should. "What are you going to do down south?"

"We don't know...Whatever we feel like doing I suppose..." I answer. But I won't be alone...

"That's good. That's very good". I almost expect him to say it's manly. But I don't think he believes in that phrase anymore. There is that look in his eyes...The way he looks so openly at me with something I can't quite put my finger on. And then he looks away. "I'm sorry Ever...I'm sorry you have to go south because of me". My heart fell again and I found myself unable to say anything. "I am so sorry. I wish you all the best..." he gave me one last glance and I caught that look again. It is fathomless and I cannot begin to guess what he means by it. _Why are you going alone?_ I think. _Why are your sisters not going with you after all you did to save their lives..._ I still smelt the ash floating away from the guild. I am no longer angry I think that emotion abandoned me a little while ago. There is a splash of water and he began to trudge towards the gate with his head bowed low. No goodbyes were necessary. I still felt his gaze though, even if he is not looking at me. That look lingered with something I can't identify. I didn't say anything as he walked out of the eastern gate. I didn't call his name nor did I look away. But I wondered again. _I wonder if I will ever see you again_...Soon the dark back with wet white hair became a small figure in the distance and then the darkness and rain pulled him away from me and I stared down the empty road of the eastern gate. _I wonder why no one asked if you were okay..._ The rain plummeted harder and I found myself pulling up my umbrella once more. _I wonder why your sisters aren't going with you..._ My sad little umbrella caught the sky's tears and I shiver as the cold set into my lungs. I coughed up a tiny mouthful of black mess. I could still see that look in his eyes. Every time I blink that look is there and I contemplated why I am still seeing it. _I wonder why you are going east..._

"Ever, what are you looking at?"

I turn and Freed was standing behind me with his elegant suit cases next to Bickslow who carried his battered duffel bag. And then Laxus who carried nothing at all. I don't know who spoke it didn't matter. For some reason their voices sound the same to me in the rain. I wonder what they are feeling but thought best not to ask. I shrug my neat backpack onto my shoulders and shook my head. "No one". No one said anything as we walked through the waterlogged street and passed through the gate that Elfman just left. But as soon as we passed through the east gate we turned south. I wonder if we should go east now. Down the Eastward Boulevard. There could be things to do east. But we turned away and I turned away without saying anything. Away from the road and away from wherever Elfman walks alone. And I wonder again as I still felt his gaze when I close my eyes. As I still saw that look in his eyes, the one I can't quite guess among the sadness.

 _I wonder if I will ever see you again..._

I wish I had said goodbye.

* * *

This fan fiction is based after the Tartarus from Fairy tail. I can't see it being longer than maybe six chapters. In my years of writing I have found that perhaps shorter fan fictions are better than longer ones. I hope you all like this. It is a slow burn and more a journey of empathy and kindness than anything else. Your thoughts on it will be much appreciated.

Lots of Love.

San-of-the-forest.


	2. Chapter 2

One year has passed. One year since the death of my home. One year since the east gate. But only a year since the green guild mark on my right breast has been exchanged for a blue gaudy one. And one year since I've heard any word of the man who walked out of the east gate alone...

I pour clear vodka into the dainty evening glasses on a tray, it looked awfully like the rain as I pour...Brutish laughter filled the air as well as cat calls from our...Patrons. But I've been at the job a while now. It is all white noise. Coconut liquor tops up the glasses and I swirl in the sauce with drops of ice. Eve's personal contribution. It has been so long since that night...Weeks after, that memory in front of the east gate replays in my mind like an old song. I would wonder in my sleep how far east my friend has gone or if he is no longer going east. But soon the Weeks stretch into months and I would wonder less and less between jobs and bartending. But I never stop completely. I balance the tray on one hand and glide over to the table of my enthusiastic patrons.

"The green beauty has brought us our dues boys!" A small man with globs of spit and lashings of gray speckling his thin beard eyed my body.

"Six white Russians for our beloved clients" I smile sultry like and lean down dangerously low to distribute the drinks. I hate this. I hate how they eye my breasts like they are entitled to them. I hate how I must act like an object to be held like a prize. But this job has also been good to us. Bob, Hibiki, Ren, Eve and even Jenny have done their part to make us feel at home. I hate how we are all objects but we are also treated with some level of respect. Jenny, me and Freed are often the ones making the rounds. Asking what our clients would have to slack their thirst and what job they would like us to do when they depart. Bickslow had the unfortunate ability to scare our clients rather than appear elegant and beautiful. He gratefully resigned to the kitchens and after hours jobs. Laxus is like an idol with Hibiki and his companions. They do nothing but look pretty and stand there. I can't tell what Laxus thinks about that. "You know just how to pour them sweetheart" the old man leaned in close to me. To close.

"My name is Evergreen, _sweetheart_ " I lean up and spin the tray in my hand. "I think you should like to remember that".

The old man raised his hands. I wanted to break them. "What ever the beauty Evergreen desires" he winked and began to slurp the drink with spit splattering his beard. His eyes never left mine and the wet booming laugh of his friends tainted my ears. I left before I did something I regret. Not all clients are bad. Some are good and polite. Others are bashful and shy and make me laugh when I slink in close enough to see their blush. I passed a few of these clients and slyly pulled drink orders from them as I took their empty glasses. It's good work and not everything is taking drinks-

The ceiling groaned above us and what sounded like a giant banged it's fists against the roof. The glasses on my tray shook and I immediately looked to Laxus who stared at the roof in silent judgement. As the noise subsided he blinked twice and then looked at me. _It's just thunder_ , is what that look told me. I am used to thunder. And then the rain began. Rain, wind and thunder lashed against the bright colourful building in it's personal attack. "It's just rain" I say to some of the disturbed patrons. "Just rain..." And then I remember again. The man that walked east. How the sky cried for him. Is it crying for him now? I shake my head. The sky is not alive and has never lived. I for some reason felt angry thinking that. The bar was in front of me again. And a golden bottle of tequila on the bench. I don't know who put it there. But I know clients would want some heavy stuff as much as I do anyway. I just begin to tip the bottle into square glasses when he turned up.

"Evergreen dear" Hibiki approached and picked up a ripe lemon. "How are you? You look a little...tense".

"I'm fine" I watch him carefully as he began to elegantly slice the lemon into wedges.

"Not the thunder?" He smiled. A bright flash filled the air and clients gasped and muttered between each other ominously. "Or the lightning?" My look was enough to answer that question. "Well I'm not surprised. But whatever is bothering you it may pay to lighten up. You have a patron".

"I'm a little busy at the moment" I mutter between tight lips.

"That's fine. Freed will continue your service to our clients".

"Then why can't Freed serve this patron?" I know I'm letting my frustration show. But as the rain drummed against the roof it also drummed against my head.

"This one is partial to women" Hibiki is being all charm but I know he may start to bite soon.

"Aren't they all?" I snap and dust the rims of the glasses with salt.

He laughed in what would be an alluring way if I was interested. Reaching across he placed the lemon wedges along the tray in circles of the tequila shots. "Look. Take the bottle with you. And once the client has offered you the job once refreshed, take the rest of the night off. I don't think you could handle the rest of the night after these" he smiled and waved his hands over the two square glasses.

I'm not about to pass up a night off. Especially with this rain. "Fine" the tequila bottle caught the moody light as I picked up the tray and balanced it on top. "But I'm taking the bottle for the night too".

"It's on the house. And table two by the door" he said to my back.

Table two is more or less the table clients go to if they don't want to be disturbed. And normally it's a singles table. That's perfectly fine with me, I don't want to deal with anyone actually. It became quieter as I approached the booth. Not many clients have ventured this close to the door this evening. It must be the weather. _"I didn't think anyone would be here"_. I flinched and nearly dropped my tray. The sky is crying tonight. Why did I remember...I can almost smell soot in the air. "Excuse me Miss...". I jolt in shock and found myself standing in front of table two. My feet must have moved forward as my mind stuck itself in the past. A wet huddled woman sat hunched in the corner of the booth. Trying to leech off some warmth from the plush cushions. She was a pretty young thing. In a common way I suppose. "I..I am your client tonight".

Well polished words pranced off my tongue before my mind could catch up. "Well that certainly makes my night serving someone as lovely as you" I smile smoothly and sat myself on the edge of the table. I placed the tequila down and wink. "It's so rare to see a woman who looks ravishing after being caught in the rain" she blushed madly and I sigh on the inside. I've served women before. It isn't as common as men and honestly I would prefer a guy in front of me right now. Women are harder to figure out for me. I suppose it is evident in the company I keep. "Warm yourself up with one of these" I pass a glass over to her with a lemon wedge and take one in my hand. The drink is gone is seconds for me, the sour sting of lemon drowning any tequila left in my mouth. She however, was nervous and didn't quite bite the lemon in time.

"Ah! That's foul!"

"Just wait for it to kick in" I purr. I'm certainly waiting. I could still hear the rain, I can almost feel it creeping into my lungs once more. If I close my eyes... I shake my head. I have a client right now. I must think about that later. And I certainly will. I may wish and wish and wish that I don't lay awake at night and think about where he is or if he is okay. But I always do in the end. I'm no liar. Small flirtatious talk with this woman comes easy. More shots even easier. It's a pleasant distraction. It seems she is getting better too. The more she takes the more relaxed she is and the more she lets herself cut loose around me. After her third one however...That's when our situation reversed.

"Oh you're so glad you never came here from where I did! The rain was pounding" she slumped on one arm and smiled crookedly with glazed eyes and flushed cheeks.

"And where was 'here' sweets?" I pour another shot for myself but hold it delicately in my hand instead of drinking.

"A dumb dour place. A really pretty lady like you would hate it!" she giggled and I managed a smile. "It is some small town to the east..."

The glass nearly fell from my hands. "The...The east". Suddenly I heard the rain again. When did I stop hearing it?

"Yeah the east...The south is much more interesting though. Where did you come from?".

East...I shake my head and glance at the girl sitting at the table. "North...". _She came from the east. Did she see..._ I blink my eyes and I see it again. That look he gave me. His sad, angry and vacant eyes looking into mine with something else...

"-Nothing but woodsmen over there". She must have been saying something. How long was she speaking? I found myself saying something before I botch this.

"Woodsman huh? I've heard that they can be very comely. Is there any female woodsman?" My voice sounded high pitched even to me.

"No..." she sighed forlornly. "I wish there was".

"Say..Darling?" I lean forward and slide her my shot. "Have you seen anyone unusual coming south?".

"Unusual?" she downs the glass and didn't even bother squeezing a lemon into her mouth. Not a good sign...

"Yes. He may stand out from the rest of the men" rain pummeled down on the roof and thunder made the roof and my head creak. I blink and those blue turned gray eyes are looking at me again, with rain water running over and down them.

"Unusual..." she hummed absentmindedly and spun the glass on the table. I wanted to pick it up and throw it at the wall. "Was this man your talking about really tall?"

"Yes yes!" I lean forward. I felt my skin prickle and saw those eyes again in the girl in front of me. Sad and vacant. "He-he had white hair and blue eyes!"

She clapped her hands and laughed at me with uncontrollable glee. I wanted to slap her mouth shut. "That's the one!" she giggled "I saw him passing through my village! He didn't stay long though-"

"Is he all right?!" I blurt out and grab her hands.

"Alright? What do you mean alright?" she giggled lucidly but then she caught the look in my eyes. And then nervousness crept into her eyes and she tried to tug her hands away from mine. I am not relenting however. "A-alright? Well, well. It is so long ago I can't quite remember. Can you let go-"

"Try!" I snap. The anger and violence in my voice nearly makes me shiver.

"H-he looked...He looked" she paused and moved her jaw around in circles. I felt her hands begin to shake. "S-sad. But more than that, or less really..."

"Less? What do you mean less?" I growl.

"H-he looked hollow. Expressionless and emotionless. But y-you could always tell he had be hurt badly. H-he didn't speak much. He looked lonely. Really really lonely-" the woman jerked forward as I stand up. "What where are you going?!"

But I had abandoned her with her shots of courage. I heard the rain. I felt it drumming down all around me as I nearly run past clients. It was everywhere and the smell of soot drifted cloyingly down my nose. "Evergreen, where are you-". It is Hibiki. But when I looked at him he didn't have his eyes. He had dark gray ones both sad angry and vacant. _Why did you go east?! Why couldn't you just stay here?!_ I was behind the bar again and rushing out to the back of the kitchens.

"Hey, what are you doing Ever-" I think I heard Bickslow. But I didn't stop running until I was outside. And then the sky's tears began to drown me amidst the thunder. _Why did you go...?_

* * *

It is no longer raining. And the woman soaked in rain and tequila has been long gone. Hibiki and Bob are giving me less bar tending shifts and more after hours work. To think I scared the woman that much...Sometimes I still see his eyes. When I blink. When I see someone tall. Someone with white hair. Someone with blue eyes...I see them now. Looking at an old parchment for a job. It's an old wanted poster. It isn't his face, but even in the rough sketches I see his eyes in place of the drawings. They both look sad so it didn't take my mind much for the charcoal pupils to turn gray and look at me with some unexplained look. I wish it would stop. I wish I never saw Elfman at the east gate. But that's a lie. And I'm not a liar. I'm not sure if I'm glad I saw him but I feel like I would regret not seeing him at all. I just wish it would end. I go to throw the paper in the bin when Freed turned into the kitchen.

"We have very good news" he even had a slight smile on his face. It must be good.

"What's so good eh? I sigh and tap my fingers in my chin.

"Fairy Tail is getting back together. Everyone is coming back". The hands fell from my face and I felt as if my legs nearly collapsed too. _They are coming back..._ "Ever? Ever are you alright?" Freed took my arm and steadied me. "You look like you are about to collapse!"

"I'm fine..." I mutter. Is that a lie? _They are coming back...They are all coming back._ But then I look up and I'm not fine again. I look up and Freed's jade eyes are dark gray, a mixture of sad, angry and vacant at the same time. _Are all of them coming back?_

* * *

Twenty apples sat in front of me on the bench, all different colours and sizes. I pick up a plump green one and begin to peel it with a thin blade. It's been not long since Freed told me that Fairy Tail is returning from the dead. But even so I have asked for more after hours work and behind the kitchen jobs. I just can't be out there...that woman caught in the rain. She saw him far to the east. How can everyone be coming back if he is so deep in the east? There are nineteen apples left. When did I finish peeling the first? I pick up a second apple. A red scrawny one where I could peel it in two cuts with my blade. I take my time and drag the edge across the skin. _Why did you go east? Why when everyone else is coming together...? Are you no longer east? Was that old news that woman told me?_ There are seventeen apples left. I don't remember picking up the third. _Are you with them now? Are you finally with your sisters?_

 _"I thought it would be best for them if I wasn't around. They agreed in their own way. Though they tried to cover it up"_ I can still hear how he laughed after he said that. I didn't sound like a laugh at all.

"Ever" a different voice. A calm and almost warm voice. Laxus.

"Hi Laxus" I felt calmer. His presence always calms me even in a storm. I kept my eyes on my work. I didn't want to see his golden bright eyes replaced with vacant deep gray.

He is quiet for a long time, just content watching me work. Until I got to the fifth apple. "Are you happy do that work?"

"Happy has nothing to do with it" I reply and place the apple in the bowl. Four to go.

"Content then?"

"That's a good word" I toss an apple in the air and he catches it sharply. He bites into but refuses to look like he is enjoying it. "Not that I don't enjoy your silent company...But why are you here?"

"I thought you would like to know some news".

"I always like some good gossip" I reply and inspect the second to last apple before I start to peel.

"You wouldn't know that. Not by the way you stay back here" I felt him step closer. I felt uncomfortable. Not because of him but because of what he is getting at. "After that night where you bolted from your lesbian girl you've never been the same. Why is that? You've never reacted that way to other chicks before".

"It was just a bad night. The rain put me off" I heard the tightness in my tone. They way I was carefully choosing some answers.

"Never in all the years we have worked with each other have you been put off by some rain" Laxus came around and sat on my bench. I felt his eyes on me but I refused to meet them. The blade of the knife began to cut away the apple. "Fairy tail is coming here". My hand jerked in shock and the blade slipped off the skin of the apple and bit deeply into my thumb.

"Shit!" I swore and threw the knife down. Blood flowed out of my thumb like a bloated river and dripped ominously on the half peeled apple. Laxus made no attempts to help me but watched me with burning scrutiny the bored through my skin. The knife slipped. My hand jerked when he said that damn sentence. "So they are coming here are they?" I hiss and press a tea towel into my thumb almost bruisingly.

"Yup. The old idiots are back again". I couldn't help but look at him now. His eyes never turned gray but they looked gold and fierce as he stared at me. "Natsu, Gray, Lucy, Erza the whole pack of asses. Even the bitches Mira and Lisanna".

I waited for that last name. For that one I was always looking out for. But he never said a single word and just stared at me. "Is that it?"

"Is there someone else you're expecting" he said sharply.

I froze. _Does he know?_ "I don't know what you are talking about" I immediately looked away and furiously bandage my thumb.

"I know you Ever. I know you don't get all caught up on something for no reason. And I noticed..." he picked up the bloody apple and rinsed it under the tap. "That I left someone's name out in particular" he took a bite of the now clean apple. I felt heat try to creep up my cheeks and no matter how much I turned away from Laxus I felt like he could just see right through me. "Is there something you want to tell me?"

 _Is there?_ I felt it creep up my chest. I felt his deep gray eyes looking at me Every time I shut my eyes. I felt that vacant and sad look. And then I told him. "You didn't see him that night..."my shoulders slumped and I dropped my bleeding hand. "When we stood out that gate. He wasn't him" I rest my forehead on my good hand. "He went east by himself. Even his sisters didn't want to go with him. They don't even know where he is". I felt some tightness in my chest and it just seemed to get worse under Laxus's intimidating glare. "I know what being alone like that does to a person. And with the frame of mind he was in..." I puff out some air and glared at the apple peels tossed aside. "What do you think he will do?" I didn't wait for an answer. "He destroyed the home of everyone he cares about to save his sisters. And then he leaves to go east and it looks like no one cares about what happens to him. Including Mirajane and Lisanna, who he practically sold his soul to save".

"I wouldn't say no one cares about him" a softer voice said. I turn sharply and Freed smiled at me next to Bickslow who is oddly sober standing in the doorway. "I think someone right here cares very much".

"You are right about that" Laxus jumped off the bench and patted my shoulder. "I for one am not happy that he isn't coming either. So who will go with Ever?"

"What?-"

"I will go" Freed stepped forward.

"Wait!" I shout and jump to my feet. "What do you mean going with me?"

"Well considering that his sisters would rather come here then even bother to find out where he is let alone if he is all right. It seems that the only people to give a damn's us" Laxus turned to me. "And I'm not 'content'..." he rolled his eyes at me. "...Leaving Elfman alone either". The tightness in my chest began to fade and I gape at Laxus. Gray eyes flashed for a fraction of a second but I am no longer scared of them. I am hopeful.

"You are really letting me do this?"

"You are letting you do this" He grasped me by the shoulders. His golden familiar eyes lifted my fallen heart and he filled me trust I feel when I am around the Raijinshuu. They are my family. "Freed. Go with Ever" he said. "Go as far east as you have to and find him. Find him and bring him back home. I don't care if it takes you two years to do this. Find him".

 _Find him..._

Tink tink tink. Something pattered on the window pane of the kitchens. And as I turned the first smatterings of rain began to dance along the crystal clear surface.

 _Bring him home..._

Our preparation was short. Our goodbye even shorter. It matters not to me, I know I will see them again. As me and Freed stepped out the door of Blue Pegasus I looked to the sky and felt the rain on my face. _How far east have you gone?_ I thought as the rain speckled my glasses. Far east no doubt. As far as his feet would carry him. _I guess I am going to find out._ We took our first steps down The Eastward Boulevard and we never looked back.

* * *

I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. It is a slightly different writing style for me and I am really enjoying in.

Lots of love.

San-of-the-forest.


	3. Chapter 3

We've been walking for many days. Days that seem to be stretching on and on as we began our journey east. We decided from the beginning not to count the days. Counting the days may make it easier for us to turn back. I never will but I don't want to make this journey east alone without my friend. Not like he did...But we are tired, very very tired. We haven't stopped longer than a night in a town. We didn't want to give up our vague trail by letting it rub cold. Nor do we want to spend so long looking for our friend. Laxus said find him even if it takes two years. But even so I don't think our reception would be more cheerful if we were gone for such a is good that the days stretch on though. It gives me more time to walk and make followed the rising sun to go east, the only real compass as the land began to change. And progress we made until we reached it.

It began as a smudge just at the edge of the horizon. A dark green and purple patch. But a couple more days of walking and it not only stretched out each end of the horizon but stretched upwards too. That's when I knew. "It's a swamp" I mutter and wipe my forehead of sweat.

"It seems it is..." Freed muttered and removed his red coat. The humidity is almost as dense as rain. "I was hoping we would avoid it. Do you think he went into the swamp?"

"I don't think he had any reason not to" I said. _Did you?_ "I was told he was seen at a village that lay in the east. A village full of woodsmen".

"Well a swamp is full of marshland trees. So no doubt woodsman of a type" my partner agreed. We found our way to this swamp by asking for a woodsman village lying to the east. I was told by strangers on the road to walk until you cannot trust the ground and you are surrounded by unkind trees. "You learnt this off your client that you scared away didn't you?"

I said nothing and walked towards the swamp. I had to trust that there was a village there. _But he is no longer there..._ I thought and brushed my hand over the small spiky bushes that we pushed our way past. _"...He didn't stay very long..."_ I remember my clients words well. _Where are you now?_ "Did you walk this path we walk now?" I ask myself quietly. I could almost see him walking next to me. His hands grazing over the thorny shrubs as I did. _Will you walk back with me?_

"Evergreen" Freed said softly. When I looked at him he smiled. "Absence makes the heart grow fonder".

I felt the heat in my cheeks like a small fire. It must be the humidity. So we pressed on to that dark purple smudge. I am beginning to smell it in the air, a thick fetid smell that almost made me halt. But I knew it was a sure sign that we are entering the quagmire. I could feel it by the way the bushes on the thin animal track began to disappear. And how the ground beneath my feet began to shift around like half melted butter. It was when my booted foot plunged into a thick mucky bog that we forced ourselves to slow down. Even a person who has lived their entire lives here should never trust a swamp. _I wonder if you had more difficulty than me walking through here...Or did you just turn back?_ But I know personally that Elfman is stubborn. He wouldn't turn back or I hope he hasn't. The fresh humid afternoon began to age and soon the hum and buzz of nocturnal creatures filled the air. "We must be careful Evergreen. There could be snakes hiding in the grass". And grass there was. Huge towering shoots of it that stretched high above my head and whispered to each other when a breeze brushed through them. But despite Freed's concern, no such vermin disturbed our path. It is early evening by the time the dark purple and green smear began to take shape, and the crude outline of twisted trees displayed themselves. I looked up and the sky is aflame with a fierce orange intensity. A promise of rain. _Will you be crying for him again?_ The ground is a cruel trial under my feet. It is no longer ground truly but a thick layer of weeds floating together on turgid water. My boots are thoroughly ruined but I am grateful the foul smelling water has not yet found a way down them.

"Of course out of all places he picked the most tiresome, disgusting and ugliest place!" I mutter and reach out to the long shoots of grass to steady myself. After a great struggle between my footing and the floppiness of the grass I manage to straighten myself and part the wall of water grass in front of me. Even blocked from the walls of grass I've been able to see the points of cruel branches reaching for the flaming sky. But as I parted the curtain of grass, it revealed to me a still black mire that stretched away to either end of the horizon. And grotesque twisted trees plunged upwards from the inky water to as far as there twisted wood fingers could reach. A thick forest standing morbidly on a lake of dark water. "How are we going to get through?" I said.

"I think we should ask very nicely" Freed said in his soft voice and pointed down the water. An orange light bobbed ominously between the dark twisted trees and it seemed as if the trees were trying to hide the light from us. But it persisted and bobbed closer and closer still. And soon a vague shape of a small boat glided out of the swamp forest and a figure with a long pole whisked closer. The fire in the sky was fading and turning into the gloominess of night so only when the boat was five meters away did I make out the person on the boat. She is small, her head covered in a dirty straw hat and she is clothed in gray green cloth that nearly made her disappear into the forest behind her. As she pulled into the weed bank she lifted her head and I was faced with a sharp angular face and pointy eyes.

"My name is Kaiya. I saw you two coming from the west. What is your business here?" Her voice quiet as if she didn't want to be found. I found myself oddly disquiet and out of place. But I found myself answering all the same.

"I am Evergreen and this is Freed. We are looking for a man" I could see his eyes again as I spoke. "He came through your village. He is tall with white hair-".

"Blue eyes and tan skin" the woman interrupted and blinked in memory. "I am never likely to forget a man who looks like that. He has gone further east from our village. But why do you seek him?"

I for some reason found myself pondering that question. Why do I seek him?

"We want to bring him home" Freed said carefully.

"Home..." The woman sighed and pulled the boat in closer. "He looked like he needs a home" and then she took my hand in hers and pulled me into the boat. I am oddly silent by her comment. The last wink of the sun deserted the sky and the only true light was the bouncing orange lantern at the edge of the boat. As soon as Freed elegantly lowered himself into the boat she pulled away from the bank. "I ferried that man across these waters too" she whispered in the dark. "There was something wrong with him. He was still and silent a great deal but despite that I couldn't help but feel there was a great deal of emotion hiding in him".

"Hollow" I repeated my clients words.

"That is a very good word to describe him" we plunged deep into the water woods. Soon a deep thrumming noise filled the air. It ebbed and flowed into a silence only to start again, but this time with more voices echoing through the mire. "Keep your hands inside the boat. You wouldn't want a water demon to eat them".

"Can you tell us about him?" I quickly pulled my hands away from the edges and eyed Kaiya with her pole.

"What was his name?"

"His name is Elfman".

"Well I am a ferry woman of this swamp. I saw Elfman little and he only stayed for two days. I heard word that he did some work for old man Morgus. Didn't last long though".

"How is that?" Freed asked.

"Through no fault of your friends. I will take you into the village and you will see for yourself". the rest of the boat trip passed in silence and my eyes watch the black rippling mire. _Why can't we just find you?_ The thrumming continued to ebb and flow but after at least half an hour of silence, the deeper we went into the mire, the more the deep noises began to fade. Soon Kaiya's orange bobbing lantern wasn't the only light we began to see. Many flickered and flashed in brief glimpses as our guide deftly turned in all direction to navigate our path. At first I mistook them for fireflies. But we rounded a hidden bend on the mire and the fireflies joined together like a blazing puzzle piece. Lights were every where. On the water on the trees and all along the high raised wooden village. The ferry woman guided us in between the salty smelling and rickety village on stilts and we soon came to know how sprawling and stretched this village is. I almost wondered if the woman I served at Blue Pegasus was here...

"Though we rarely get visitors you will find a bed in that house there" Kaiya pointed to a larger than normal house. "I will leave you here. If you need to find old man Morgus keep going down this path here until the third to last house on your left. He may tell you more about your blue eyed friend".

Me and Freed scramble up and onto the raised wooden walk way and tried to ignore the slimy mildew on our hands. "Hey thanks-" I begin but our guide was already paddling her way back into the dark. I found myself suddenly out of place in the middle of a tree infested swamp. The fact that I'm trying to pick up a year old trail that is nearly cold unsettles me to much.

"Ever" Freed's hand touches my shoulder. "I will see about rooms. Do you want to talk to Mr. Morgus?"

"Yeah" I answer and try to shrug off my discomfort. "I won't be long. And please make sure there is no bugs in my bed".

"Don't worry. Something tells me that this village accommodates for that particular nuisance" as he spoke his fingers lashed out like a snake and he snapped a mosquito between his fingers. "We can't stay in motels and inns all the time Ever. We only brought enough money to last us the way east and back with hopefully a third person".

" _With_ a third person" I nod and turn down the wooden path as Kaiya directed. "And I know, I do..." I said walking away. _"Hopefully with a third person"..._ That sentence unsettled me further. Does Freed have faith we will find Elfman, let alone if we can convince him to come back? The first patterns of rain speckled the already slippery walk way and I sigh. I knew rain would come. I passed small wooden houses with thatched roofs and counted them as I went. People walking down the same walkway gave me sharp looks and muttered between themselves. They dressed like Kaiya and even bared heavy resemblance to her. Some even asked where I was going. "I'm looking for Morgus. He had some work done with my friend a little while ago". When they exchanged uneasy looks the discomfort in me grew to a new level and they pointed down the uneven walkway.

"Keep going".

So I did. And this time a little faster. More rain was beginning to drip down between the cruel trees that stretched far upwards. I tilted my face up as if to catch the rain and I caught a glimpse of a fat white circle in the sky before the clouds and trees ate it. Another full moon. While we decided not to count days that hasn't stopped me from counting moons. And this is the second full moon I have seen on our walk east. _How many more moons will I see?_ And still I found myself walking further and further down the rain soaked walkway. People began abandoning it in the rain and the further I walked I saw a house that stood out from the rest. Instead of a thatched roof, it had a timber one. And it looked fresh too. When I reached it, I peered around the corner and only two more houses sat awkwardly at the end of the walkway. _So this is it..._ Kaiya's words came back to me. _"He did some work for old man Morgus. It didn't last long though"._ I reached up and knocked on the door. Silence. I waited for a moment and then two. And finally I knocked again and more insistently. Rough grumbling muttered behind the door and it was wrenched open by a short ugly old man. He looked like a potato.

"What the hell do you want?!"

I am cold. Uncomfortable, tired and angry. Right now I don't want to be snapped at by a grumpy old man. But Blue Pegasus has told me the importance of manners. And if I want the information I want...

"I'm sorry to disturb you-"

"Damn right you should be! I was half asleep!" His voice grated against my ears.

"...Right. But this very important" I try to smile and he squints up at me.

"You are too pretty to be from around here! Where you from?".

If I say Fairy Tail or even Blue Pegasus it might make him less likely to speak to me if he has even heard of the guild in this isolated swamp. Also the point of Elfman running away east was so he could find a place where no one knew him. I don't want to jeopardize that for him even if I intend on him coming back. So I smile sweetly in the cold pouring rain and try to keep all impatience out of my face. "I'm from the north. Past the city Crocus".

"Crocus?" He hawked and spat on the wooden planks. "You're a long way from home lassy! What brings you to old man Morgus?"

The rain began to soak through my clothes. And any warmth the day brought on me is now being leeched away by the rain. Morgus's black better eyes peered up into mine and I am reminded of that old client that ogled me in Blue Pegasus. No lust was there or if it was it is well concealed. But something in his gaze stopped me from telling all the truth. "We are looking for a man that came into your service for a short while. He is wanted by the magic council for their business" I lie. The rain soaked through my clothes, hair and dripped down my face until it stung. But when I blink I see the eyes staring at me with a quiet accusation. _You are wanted_ I said to the eyes. _We want you to come home..._

"A man huh?" He grinned a croaked out a rusty laugh. "Tall fella aye? With white hair and blue eyes?"

"That's the one".

He laughed again viciously and a sense of unease built up in me at his obvious glee. "That bastard is long gone further east".

"Further east?" I bit my lip until it hurt but managed to maintain the calmness in my face. "How long ago was this?"

"How long ago?" He drummed his fingers on the door and puckered his wrinkled forehead. "Can't say less than six months. I shoved the bastard off in less than three days though, Ha!" He spat on the wooden planks again. "He went that way" he pointed down the murky water that stretched eastwards like a dark snake. Rain drummed off it furiously like it was drumming off my head. _"I shoved that bastard off in less than three days!"._

"Thank you for your time" I forced a smile and turn to leave.

"Oi lass!" He called again. My hands scrunched into fists yet I remained calm otherwise.

"Yes Mr. Morgus?"

"If you see that man, tell him Morgus says hi" the scorn in his tone is poisonous. The rain drummed against my head and I slowly turned back to the old man laughing at his own joke in the rain.

"Mr. Morgus, why did you call him a bastard?"

"Eh?" He frowned and flicked the spittle off his chin. "What do ya mean why I called him a bastard? You're with them magic cops you should know!", but when I frowned he sighed and rubbed at his face again. "I have heard of that bastard before he came through here".

"You've heard of him?" I looked around the tight seclusive village and raised a brow mockingly.

"Aye I have! You aren't the only people to ever come through here" he spat again and eyed the rain falling all around us. "I've heard word of many things from travelers" Morgus began. "And I've heard of a tall man with white hair do some pretty dark things. I've heard he killed a sister of his. I've heard he destroyed a guild hall but for whatever reason I'm not sure. So when I saw this fella come through my village...Well I needed to make sure it was him. I offered him a job chopping enough wood for this roof here. I needed a proper roof after all. All the thatch kept falling in me face and stopping me sleeping. He took it and I immediately knew after seeing him work. Big guy, strong, and a mean looking scar...There was no denying it. So I told him after he finished that second log".

"What did you tell him?" unease and anger twisted in me like a snake.

"I told him that I didn't know how he could live with himself. How he could keep on living after he killed his sister and after he destroyed that piece of history. And then I told him that he has to leave and that he would be better off dead! He would be lucky if one of those water demons ate him".

"...Thank you for your time Mr. Morgus" I said. I looked up at the fresh cut wood that protected his ugly old face from all that thatch falling on it. I looked at the smooth cuts and the precision of the lengths and weight they were cut down to. And then I looked back at the ugly old man at the door who cackled as I was being soaked in the rain. When I turn away I see his eyes again in the murky water below the walkways. I looked at the way the rain fell in them like tears.

"No problem lass! You should've seen the look on his face. Ha! He pressed off in no time and looked as fragile as a wee lamb..."

I couldn't here him after that. I walked to far and the rain on the wood and trees and creek began to drown him out. Coldness that crept through my clothes crept into my heart and I felt something that I can't quite determine, something that felt dark and dreadful. _Thank you for your time..._ I passed houses without thinking and the puddles on the walkway almost seemed to draw back from me before I put my foot down. I passed two girls standing in a doorway, giggling over some parcel they had in their hands. They reminded me of his sisters. They had no care in the world other than what they had between them. No care for the people stuck in the rain. The big house began to take shape through the gloom of rain and the nightly shadows of the trees. I stepped into the doorway and dropped my coat onto a rusty nail with no emotion except for that cold dark feeling.

"Hello, you must be with your friend with the green hair" a bright voice said. I looked up and a perky girl behind a kitchen bench smiled sweetly and waved to me. She reminded me of Mirajane, the way she acted like everything is okay. "He has a room for the both of you upstairs! Oh you are wet, I can get-"

"Thank you for the room" I muttered and turn towards the rickety stairs up into the seconds level. _"I told him that I didn't know how he could live with himself "_ . My feet found themselves before an open door and Freed sitting on a bed encased with netting from anything that might come from the outside inside tonight.

"Why did you let yourself get so wet?" he asked as he picked at some of his clothing in a bag. Saying nothing, I sat on my own tiny low bed and brought my knees up to my chest. That dark feeling built up in my heart more and more and I glared at the wall angrily. "...Did you find something about him?" I only nodded in response and Freed kept his silence. But only for a little while. "He will be okay Ever. We both know what he is like".

I shook my head and saw those sad gray eyes staring at me even with my own eyes shut. "No we don't not anymore. You knew him as bright, happy and...And just being Elfman. When I saw him that night he wasn't that. He wasn't anything" that cold dreadful emotion in my heart grew like a splotch of ink. I couldn't get the sound of Morgus's laughter out of my head. _"I told him to leave and that he would be better off dead!"_

Freed was silent after that and soon he lay down in his tiny low bed and pulled the netting tight around him. I stared at the wall and felt like it was staring back, and each second that passed the dark feeling grew and grew. _I wonder if you are having a nice sleep with no thatch falling in your face..._

* * *

We are back in that small little boat going east once more. Warm morning sun managed to filter it's way through the trees and touch my face. A pleasant feeling after all that rain. And the dark angry feeling in my heart was gone, only to be replaced with something better than satisfaction. I didn't sleep last night and the smooth rocking of Kaiya's raft was almost easing me into a half sleep. But splinters dug into my palm as I slumped against the wooden side. Besides, I didn't want to sleep anyway.

"Are you alright, Ever?" Freed touched my shoulder. "You look like you are going to faint".

"I had a restless night, that's all..." I trail off as foot steps thundered on the walkway on either side of us.

"...His house!"

"I saw a bright flash last night..."

"It could be lightning!"

"But no thunder?!"

"What is all that chatter?" Kaiya leaned forward and peered up at the walkway. I shrugged and picked at the splinters in my hand. Eventually all the noise became thunderous and Kaiya pulled further out into the main current of the river just as a voice filtered into the air.

"My roof! A damn fucking tree fell through my roof!" Morgus, covered in dust and splinters howled and stamped his feet in a wild rage. And sure enough his roof is caved in with a monstrous tree crushing half a wall and the entire ceiling.

"What?!..."Kaiya breathed and pulled back her straw hat. I tried not to smile and managed to remove and irritating splinter from the ball of my thumb. "Lightning? I was at the edge of the swamp last night and there was no lightning!".

Morgus's head twitched and he roughly turned himself towards the creek as we slowly drifted down stream. As we drifted away his brow furrowed and unconcealed wrath pulled his ugly old face into a rabid snarl. "I'm sorry to see your new ceiling in ruins, Mr. Morgus. I hope you find someone to build a new one for you!" I call with my lips twitching furiously into a smile. But perhaps I was too far away for him to see. "And a new wall while they are at it!"

I blinked and I felt his eyes behind mine again. Deep and gray and sad. Morgus's eyes stayed locked onto mine until we drifted down a bend of the stream. And then the lumber village hidden in the swamp was lost to me and the old man with no roof at all.

"There was no lightning last night...How did that tree fall in with no one knowing?" Kaiya said out loud. I felt eyes on my back and turned to see Freed staring at me oddly as if to ask a question. But I turned away as the creek drifted us further east. "It will take him years to rebuild that wall stably above water, and the roof too. How did that tree fall?!" the ferry woman muttered as I picked another small splinter out of my hand. Guilt almost wormed it's way into my heart, but then I remembered the rain and his eyes. _"And then I told him that he has to leave and that he would be better off dead!"_

The guilt vanished in an instant.

We were silent except for the trickle of the murky stream. And the creak of the small boat as we shuffled our setting sometimes. But eventually Kaiya spoke. "I will take you as far as this stream goes east. From there you will have to walk to wherever you want to go. But directly north from where I leave you is more swamp. But if you keep walking east you will come across the great grass sea that is as gold as the setting sun. But if you go there, never leave the stream. You will not find any water source that I know of for a great deal of time". I looked over the water underneath us and at my warped reflection looking back. My brown eyes behind my glasses almost seemed gray.

"We won't leave the stream" I said and removed the last splinter in my hand. _I wonder how far away you are now?_

* * *

Sorry this took so long to update. But I wanted to get this chapter right and I had to rewrite so much of it! Well leave a like and a review if you want! I really appreciate them!

Lots of love.

San-of-the-forest.


	4. Chapter 4

Stepping out of the tiny little boat was more difficult than expected. Especially when you are stepping out onto a muddy bank. However we managed though my boots are more ruined than before. Kaiya pushed her small boat back into the middle of the creek and raised a hand in farewell.

"Take care walking through the grass sea" said Kaiya. "You shall not find people for a great while. And never leave the creek!"

"We won't" I too raised my hand in farewell.

"I hope you find your friend. Though I doubt he lingered in the grass sea" she wasted no time in turning her boat around and returning to her far away swamp full of woodsmen. Freed and I stayed on the bank until her gray form dwindled out of sight. Only then did we turn and face the grass plains before us. Gold it was called like the setting sun, yet to me it is a pallet of all warm colours in the world. Burnt red the earth is where you could see it. And waist high shoots of grass boasted colours of pale yellow to rich wheat gold. The grass stretched as far as the eye could see.

"I don't see much evidence of wild life. I think finding things to eat will be...challenging" Freed checked the creek's bank for signs of tracks. We didn't take much food from the village. And that might prove to be our mistake if this grass plain is truly an ocean.

* * *

We followed the creek as instructed but it isn't the way I want to go. The creek was barely two meters wide and varied in depth as we walked, yet it did not show signs of drying up to my relief. And yet the fresh green water wasn't all good. East we wanted and yet north it wandered but I was not going to leave the creek. I do not trust the grass sea, not the way it whispers as the wind blows away. Not the way the grass clicks in strange ways when you pass by it by bug or whatever lies beneath the shoots. And certainly not the quietness, the absolute lacking of life except for our blundering and brash seeming movements. The dry banks crumbled under our feet and I peered into the green water next to us. Small bodies darted under the water, dabbing at the old things at the bottom of the creek. _Well at least there is fish no matter how small..._ I shuffled my pack on my shoulder and frowned at the lightness. I remember the small pack Elfman carried out of the east gate too. It is small for someone so big. It makes me wonder if he truly had so few possessions. I bit my lip and watch the fish dart around the green water as Freed glided in front of me. _I bet he came better prepared than this..._ Grey eyes flashed behind my closed lids and yet again I can see that strange look he gave me. So strange and yet so puzzling it haunts me to this day with such clarity I could see him in front of me. Over a year and I still can't understand that look. I opened them again and studied the green water, wanting to see anything other than gray. And yet I spy something else...

A tall dark shadow stretched across the water towards us, a tall dark shadow with strangely long arms and a long head cocked to the side. I could almost feel my bones seize up and I froze in place to stare at the rippling shadow. I almost dared to hope. To hope that we found him and that we no longer had to go east. To see if his eyes are no longer gray. But then the shadow began to slink away from the water and I wasn't quick enough to catch anything besides the rustling of the tall grass and a dark almost coal black hand slip away between the reeds. "No!..." I cried out but my voice faded and I stared across the green waters to the silent and golden grass that were still and silent.

"Ever?" Freed's voice was soft as ever and he stopped walking to look at me. "What is it?"

"Didn't you see him?!" I shook as I pointed across the creek. Is he still there?

"See who Ever?" Freed took my hand and pulled it down. "There was no one there".

"But there was a shadow" I gestured vaguely at the green creek. "Right there, long and black".

"Did you see who it was?" said Freed very seriously, his light green brows drawn low.

"Just a hand...Just a hand"

"Do you think it was him?" he asked and this time he sounded almost urgent.

"It was..." _a long dark hand,_ I thought. Elfman's hand flashed in my mind. Long and broad covered in scars, strong enough to crush rocks into dust, but so gentle. Gentle enough to soothe a nervous rabbit and pet it's soft fur until it shone, gentle enough for it to fall limp in his hands and into a deep sleep. But this wasn't that hand. This hand was too dark and too slender. No...It wasn't. "It wasn't him, Freed, sorry". Freed muffled a curse and rubbed his eyebrows deeply.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Probably some nomad" said Freed with a sigh.

"No what is it?" _why are you so annoyed?_

"I didn't think it would be this hard to find him, that's all" said Freed with a reluctant sigh.

"Freed, he has been gone for a year. That's a whole year's worth of ground to cover", but that look of annoyance sent unease through me. "It's not like we would find him immediately. Especially if he doesn't want to be found".

"But do you want to search for him for a year?"

"...What are you talking about Freed? You heard what Laxus said. 'Even if it takes us two years we will find him'" I shake my head and kick angrily at the grass, wishing that I never saw the shadow or that it never disappeared.

"I know, I know" said Freed reassuringly and dropped a hand on my shoulder. "I just miss Laxus, and Bickslow. Even Ichiya believe it or not. Their presence would not go amiss even in this dismal land" with a faint smile he turned around. "I bet Laxus would personally electrify the grass until none stood in out way. And I know Bickslow would send his puppets racing through the reeds and creek chasing all manner of insects" I giggled and imagined the those grinning dolls chasing the poor dragonflies. But soon Freed's sad voice turned serious again. "Who ever that shadow belonged I wished we could speak to him. He may know where our missing traveler went" he began his robotic march along the bank again and I uncomfortably adjusted my half empty bag.

 _I miss them all too..._ I thought sadly and wished badly that Laxus and Bickslow joined us on our venture. Bickslow could always make me laugh even if he saw how empty my bag is. And Laxus's presence was always a solid comfort. I kept my eyes on the bank daring that slender dark hand and long shadow to reappear, but whoever that nomad is, he is certain in keeping silent. _And our missing traveler...I wonder who you miss after all this time?_ And then those eyes, those empty gray eyes blinked behind mine, looking at me for something. Something I couldn't quite place. "If you saw him that night" said I and unhappily kicked a chip of clay into the creek. The water rippled and the eyes behind mine disappeared. "It was just him, and then less". The silence stretched on for a uncomfortably long moment and Freed's back stooped in thought as he does.

"Does he truly linger in your mind all the time?". The comment struck me like a brazen flame and scorched my cheeks until they burned hotter than the sun could burn them. My silence is my comfort, and yet it would be more so if I knew where he is and if he is safe.

"I just wished I said goodbye..." I murmured finally.

"Then you will find your chance to say hello", with that we walked in a strange silence dedicated to thoughts beyond our feelings. But that was only for awhile and when the sun began to set and the green waters of the creek turned darker like ink did Freed turn to me for the second time. "Think on what you have said Ever. 'Especially if he doesn't want to be found' were your own words. Please keep that in mind".

* * *

The grass never ends, and I find myself oddly weak as we trek along the stream. My bag, now light enough that it slaps against my back with each step is a hollow knock on my emptier stomach. We do not lack for water though. We walk in the night to escape the burning sun and we try even harder to preserve our dwindling supplies, and yet it has gotten to the point where we are both desperately trying to find other things to eat. We catch the small fish and lizards and devour them raw. An easy thing for me, when I was a child I had no other choice...But that never is enough. We gnaw on the pale shoots of grass buried on the earth, the bitter flavor lingering in our teeth even though we frequently drink from the creek. That is the only satisfying thing in this ocean of grass. The water is tasteless and refreshing, but after a scant meal of grass shoots and cooked frog it is beginning to lose it's charm. And yet I find myself drinking from it more and more...

The pale moonlight beat against my eyes and I couldn't bear to look at the sky. A bitter thirst ravaged my throat and the ground almost began to tilt beneath my feet. And yet I am never lingering from my path. Even if it is leading anywhere but East, I am even the first one to rise in the failing dusk. A hot breeze raced across the now gray grass and blasted my face until I flinched from the force. My knees shook and I almost collapsed if it wasn't for the pale slender hand holding me up. "Ever, you're shaking..."

"I'm fine" my voice rasped painfully and I staggered to the creek. The cool water made my body tingle as I hastily scooped mouthfuls of the fluid in my mouth, yet it is never enough. "Gah!" I cough and shake on my knees as my throat burned when the water touched it. Those same pale hands pushed back my hair and touched my forehead tenderly.

"Ever, you are awfully warm!" said Freed as he wiped away dregs of sweat. "You shouldn't have eaten that frog!"

"There are things I expect to hear in life and then there is that..." I grin and struggle to my feet and face the right direction once more. "I'll be fine. I'll sleep it off in the mornin'..." each step feels heavy as I walked, the water sitting in my stomach like a rock as my throat burned. And after a handful of moments I hear Freed begin to follow, the grass rustling behind him. And then I saw something, a flash of movement in front of the low moon and a tingle ran up my spine. My feet landed against the ground in their heavy and steady pace but my eyes steadily dragged to the right. A tall black silhouette leaned against an equally tall and slim spear, with a strangely hooked edge on one side. Any more details I couldn't make out, except that as the waning moon flashed her face from behind a cloud, the person's eyes glowed like a dog's caught in the light. And then with a rustle he was gone into the long pale grass. Why I didn't tell Freed what I saw I cannot say.

* * *

"Where...where...where" I muttered over and over as the sun beat down on me through the shade of grass. _Where are we?_ I thought and collapsed to the ground as I tried to rise. Freed made strange noises that I can't quite hear and dabbed at my brow with a ragged wet cloth. The sun warmed water felt like ice on my brow making me gasp until I scourged my throat further. "Water..." I murmur. Soon enough I had it but the fluid barely touched my throat and hurt it as it passed, but I still wanted more. _Where is the sky?_ I reached upwards towards the blurred haze of blue, smudged with the waving tops of grass. My throat is parched again and I beg for water for a second time. Freed for some reason does not give it. Minutes, hours, days, I cannot count the time that passes beyond my shaking and creaking breaths. Eventually I lost sight of the green blob that is Freed's head and he did not return. _I wonder if you are far away, or just at my feet? I don't have the strength to look..._ Strength. What a pathetic word. Everybody judges a character on strength. Some people are like steel. Strong in body and will, like Erza. Erza, who never cracks under the heaviest of pressures. Erza, who always puts others before her. Erza, the queen of Fairy tail. She truly is unbreakable, she is even the reason Fairy Tail is getting back together. It has been over two months now. Everybody would have met up at the guild and started to rebuild. I wonder if they miss us, all of us. And that they have a new guild built for us and our arrival.

"I wouldn't bet on that".

"Huh?" I frown at the voice that I can hear just above my head.

"It takes longer than two months to build a building as large as it was". A deep voice spoke softly above my head, but sounded clearer than the wind in the grass and the whisper of the creek and I instantly know who it is.

"It would take longer than that wouldn't it? A lot longer to do anything that needs to be done..."

"And what needs to be done?" he asked.

"Find you" I swallowed around my burning throat and rolled my eyes upwards to try and see anything. "You're not really here".

"No...No I am not" a head popped into view very slowly and pale gray eyes looked into mine from far above.

"Your eyes are not blue..." I felt something wet trickle off my face as I tried to see better.

"A lot of things are less colourful then they once were" the blurred face said. I can just make out strands of white hair drifting around him.

"They don't have to be, not at all" I said, and something pressed down against my forehead that made the burning cool, and the heat in my throat became that much more bearable. "Is that your hand?"

"Is that a problem?"

"No...It's just I never felt them before" I said and tried to feel the shape, the warmth, the size of his hand. And yet I could feel nothing. Blinking, I imagined the hand running over my face. Down over my temple onto the soft flesh of my cheek and running his thumb over it gently. Maybe it is my fever, or maybe an excited imagination, but I began to feel the gentleness of his hand. The roughness of the pad of his thumb. The largeness and length of his masculine hands. "Gentle enough to soothe a nervous rabbit and pet it's soft fur until it shone..." I mutter under the touch.

"If I had done this in real life..." his voice said gravely.

"I would not object" I answer.

"Really? I remember a time when you hit me because I asked you to do something".

"You didn't ask very nicely" I reminded and opened my heavy lidded eyes. The gray eyes were still there and they began to twinkle blue for a moment.

"I will remember to ask very nicely next time" his thumb strayed dangerously close to the corner of my lip, making it tingle.

My face burned, whether from the fever or my hallucination I couldn't tell. "Stop that!"

"You're imagining me doing it" but his fingers drifted away and rested against my forehead again. The blue flame in his eyes died and I was left with the gray dead ones in their place. They were exactly the same as the ones that night. In all their vacant ways except the look in his eyes. All humor between us died in that moment and I couldn't tear my eyes away.

"Are you alright?" I asked quietly.

"Do you think I would be?"

"No...No I don't think you would be" I shook my hazy, fever sickened head. "Why did you do it?"

"Do what?"

"Elfman, you looked at me that night. And for some god damn reason I can't guess it! Why did you look at me like that?", there is silence for a while and the pressure on my forehead eases a fraction. "Why Elfman?! Why?"

"I can't answer that, Ever" he said a tears began to roll from the gray eyes and onto my head and hair. "I'm just an unmanly imagination".

"Then stop being an imagination and be real!" I felt the wetness on my face grow more and my breaths became short. "I'm...I'm worried about you. I'm scared that you are alone. I'm scared at what being alone will do to you!", memories came back to me. Memories from long ago when I had to keep moving, when I had to eat vile things from creeks and trees. Before I found my family.

"If you look back you are lost, Ever" the pressure on my forehead began to fade and the tears from the gray eyes pattered all around me. And soon they began to fade too and the white hair drifting around the face.

"I only look East" I said as my vision began to darken. My dreams or hallucinations became more and more vivid. The world was pure dead gray and standing over my limp body was Laxus and Bickslow silently. Then cold drops or rain dripped through their bodies until they became warped parodies of themselves and faded away. There was too many fever dreams to count, or maybe just one big one that changed all the time. I was in a plain gray world one second. To a dark forest with cruel long trees and shadows that lunged at me between the trunks. I was scared, more scared than I have been in what felt a life time. But I had to keep moving, I had too! Because something was following me, something I was running away from. A beast that would kill me.

"You need to stop running..."

"Ah!" I gasp awake as my head pounded like a drum and my throat screamed in silent pain. Cold, hard rain fell from the sky and pattered on my face and already soaked body. "Who said that?" I muttered and sat up even though my body angrily spasmed as I moved. Freed is at my feet. His body strewn limply on the ground, his body thin, and cheek bones gaunt. "No...No Freed!" I gasped and crawled over to his body. "Please...Freed wake up. Wake up!" I shook his body and felt the limp muscles roll easily under my grip. "No, no no! Wake up! Wake up!" I wasn't unconscious for hours. I was unconscious for days. "Shit! Shit" I cursed. I couldn't wake him up! I could scarce feel his breath from his mouth let alone rouse him. "No no no no n-"

I heard something. The snap of dry grass beneath feet, the whisper of grass passing beneath a stray hand, and through the corner of my eye, two large black feet stepped to the bank of the creek from the other side. The mysterious nomad leaned against the long and dangerous spear and regarded us with pale eyes as the silence stretched on between us. Rain peppered my face and plastered my limp greasy hair to me as I reached out to this stranger. God what I sight I must look. "Please help..." I beg and then my world dimmed for a second time and darkness took me.

* * *

"Hmmm hmm, hm hm hmmm. Ha ha haha ha..."

"Eh?" I grumble and tossed my head.

"Lala lala lala la. Dada dada dada da..."

"Bickslow would you stop singing" I mutter and rub my head.

"That is very very rude" a chirpy voice said. "At least let this One finish the song. Hmm ha hmm hmm hmm...". My eyes snapped open to the blackness of the night sky peppered with million upon millions of twinkling stars. There was heat next to me, the crackle and pop of what must be a fire and a peculiar smell. _That voice isn't Bickslow's or Freed's..._ I look slowly towards the fire and in the dim light I caught a flash of dark eyes looking at me over the flames. "Tra la lala la la laa...", the person shifted something to my right and I caught a glimpse of a long and sharp spear with a hooked edge.

"You!" I shout and struggled to sit up.

"Me!" the person replied with a twinkle in their eyes.

"What are you doing?! Where is Freed?!" I looked around desperately and my eyes landed on a pale face with stringy green hair strewn around him in a halo besides the fire. "No no Freed!" I cry and lunge for his body.

"Do not move him girly-"

"What have you done to him!" I shout among the silent grass planes.

"Saved his life".

"Saved his life! He looks dead on the ground!" I shout. "Freed! Freed!" I shake him violently when something sharp dug into my neck.

"One saved his life. One, does not want girly to undo hard work", my eyes drifted to the sharpness on my neck and the dim light of the fire caught the glint of spear pressed against my throat. "Remember girly. Remember...", and like a dream, memories slowly came back to me. Our leaving of the swamp, the walk down the creek, the emptiness of our bags. And eventually the great gray eyes above mine and a gentle touch on my face.

"Oh. Oh..." I sigh and release Freed's shoulder.

"Girly remembers. Girly knows", the spear was lifted away and placed next to the person with the dark skin and the glinting eyes.

"What happened?" I whisper and lift Freed's pale and limp fingers into my own. "What happened to both of us".

"Little food for girly and green boy here" the person pointed to Freed. "Girly and boy became tired. Girly to tired to feel snake bite her foot".

"What?" I look down at my feet and just around the ankle two dark holes stood out against the pale skin. "But I thought it was because of the frog!"

"Frog is good. Snake is bad, snake waited until foot was out of boot, and snake numbed skin before bite" the person hooted with laughter.

"Then snake waited a long time..." I hold onto Freed's fingers carefully, his face is so drawn and pale I fear he may fade away. "What happened to him?"

"No food. No food for five days, green boy gave food to girly in her sick sleep".

"What!" I said and glare down at Freed. "Why would you do that you fool!"

"Would girly not do that for green boy?"

"Well-"

"Then green boy would always do that for girly!" the nomad giggled and clapped their hands. "This One fed green boy mushed up grass. Yucky but green boy couldn't complain, and girly was easier. This One sucked out venom and made water on snake bite".

"Made water...MADE WATER?! You peed on me!" I scream in disgust and threw my foot into the cool creek. "WHY DID YOU DO THAT?!"

"Made water to clean. Made water to purify" the nomad giggled again. "Hm hmm hm hm hmm, la la lala laaaaaa..."

"Look shut up for a moment!" I snap and rubbed vigorously at my foot. "Who are you?!"

"This One is One. For One is only me!" the person grinned and clapped their hands again. "And didn't One tell you it is rude to interrupt a song?"

"Didn't anyone tell you it is rude to _pee_ on other people?!"

"Is it rude to save girly's life?" the nomad shifted forward into the light and for the first time I got a look at the face. The person in front of me is odd to describe. He or she was neither male not female from how they looked, One, had a face and body that could be both and a voice and mind that is both. He or she was not something of two separate things but One.

"Who are you?" I said.

"I am only me" One smiled and nodded sagely. "Who are you girly?"

"I am Evergreen" I reply and cautiously pull my foot out of the water. Around the bite mark was a dark purple ring that throbbed every time I touched it. _The last of the poison_ I thought.

"Well Evergreen girly, you talk funny in your sleep. Mentioning strange names like, Biscuit and Lucky. Something to do with fairies too..." One tapped their chin grinned as gray hair fell into their eyes.

"Biscuit and Lucky? Who is Biscuit and Lucky?" I asked.

"Girly should tell One!"

 _Biscuit and Lucky, biscuit and lucky. The fairy thing is obvious but what does biscuits and luck have to do with anything...Wait a minute._ "You don't mean Bickslow and Laxus?!"

"Bickslow and Laxus? What silly names!"

"Well it is certainly better than Biscuit and Lucky!" I can imagine the look of horror on their face if they knew their names were Biscuit and Lucky!

"Not true! A biscuit is yummy and can be eaten. And it is always good to have luck! What does a Bickslow and Laxus do anyway?"

"Bickslow and Laxus are who they are!" I said and felt myself beginning to smile at this foolish person.

"What's a Laxus?"

"What's a Laxus?" I gape, "What's a Laxus?! Only the most powerful wizard in the world! He took down a wizard saint, is a dragon slayer, and could beat anyone in a fight!" I held my head proudly. "And the leader of our team!"

"Oh so that is a Laxus! Sound very important to be a Laxus! Is a Bickslow a dragon slayer and a butt kicker too?"

"Well, not the same-"

"Not the same but very similar" One nodded again as if One was someone of great knowledge. "And what's green boy's name?"

"His name is Freed".

"Good morning Fred" One nodded to Freed.

"No not Fred, Freed" I said

"Not Fred?"

"No".

"Just Freed?"

"Just Freed".

"Strange names strange indeed. But you did say another name, another one indeed. Elfman" One's eyes glinted cunningly in the firelight.

"Elfman?!"

"Elf man. Man of Elf. Rather ridiculous name if you ask this One, but this One knows this name" One cocked a head towards me. "You and One have something in common".

"Have you met him?" I lean forward eagerly. "Have you seen him here?!"

"Who, Man of Elf?"

"Yes, Elfman" I gesture impatiently to The Nomad.

"One saw him long time ago. One spotted big Elf from long way away! Very big man is easy to see in these plains, and One has never seen such a big man" The Nomad shook one's head and laughed. "Big Elf puts Green Boy to shame!" One patted Freed's limp head. "But One is curious...Why did Girly say Big Elf's name hmm?"

"We are looking for him, and have been looking for him for a while" I sigh. "It's a long story..."

"We have long time 'til sun rises Girly, and even longer 'til Green Boy wakes" One smiled at me gently. "One has time".

There is something about The Nomad that made me tell the story. It's not like I had any reason not to tell, but maybe it was One's sparky and quirky personality. Or the way that One is honest with me, and how I feel One wouldn't judge me. But I tell One everything. From our attempts of tacking over Fairy Tail to Tenrou to the attack of Tartarus, Elfman's part in everything, and my part too. It was long and often I stopped to refresh myself, it was when the stars and moon disappeared and the sun had finally heaved itself from the sky that I finished. "So that's it...That all of it..."

"All of it Girly? Girly why are you here?" One's voice became sad and drained like I feel.

"To bring him home" I answer without hesitation.

"Girly shouldn't have let him leave, Big Elf has done much for Girly and-"

"YOU DON'T THINK I DON'T KNOW THAT?!" I shout and clap my hand against my face trying to smack some calm into me until I was ready. "I know I shouldn't have let him leave, I knew...I knew how being alone can be and...He's gone, I let him go". One is silent and stirred the dying embers of the fire between us. It was a handful of moments before The Nomad spoke.

"One spoke to Big Elf...One spoke to Big Elf long time ago and like you right next to this creek" One picked up the spear and began to stir the creek's water next to us. "He didn't speak about what you speak, and One not know what One knows now. But then One could tell that Big Elf isn't built for life alone".

"I knew he wasn't" I rest my forehead in my hand and close my eyes to everything around me. _One spoke to Elfman...I wonder if I am sitting where they spoke right now?_

"One thinks there is two peoples. A people built for themselves. For big plains, quietness and this up here" One tapped One's crinkled temples. "Then there is second people. People who like to be with loved ones, like people around them, like action, doing, seeing and making! Big Elf is one of these peoples. One knew this when One met him, One asked why Big Elf is alone. Big Elf did not speak what Girly speaks"

"What did he say then?"I ask with my eyes covered in darkness of my hand.

"Big Elf spoke of a family, of two sisters. And then of a bigger family. He only said that he had to leave them. But now One knows why".

"He did what he did to save his little sister" I mutter.

"But One doesn't understand, One doesn't understand why Big Elf leaves for a building?"

"Fairy Tail isn't just a building. It is a symbol. Of power and freedom of what people can do to help others. It is something far older and greater than a building..." I explain. _And it's coming back! We are all coming back._

"But Big Elf never ruined your Fairy Tail then. He did what he did for the freedom of his sister, he did what he did to help others. One thinks Big Elf used power to stop Demon from hurting anyone else" One frowned and gestured to me. "Big Elf destroyed nothing!"

"Hmm" I smile with no humor. "Tell that to him, tell that to everyone in the guild. It is a symbol but so many people grew up in the guild. So many people made friends and found each other there. Besides...His reception after wasn't warm even from his sisters. They agreed he should go" I said bitterly. "It is also not the first time a...an accident happened in his family. It was years ago and Elfman blames himself for it. He hasn't been the same after that".

"...One wonders...Why Girly is here and not Big Elf's sisters?"

"It's..." I hesitate and remember Tenrou and everything after that. The look he gave me and the rain lashing down on us. "...It's complicated".

"Doesn't sound complicated to One. Girly told One the story, Girly and Big Elf have their own story no?"

"Well...Well I wouldn't call it that please" I shift uncomfortably and felt my face warm.

"Why not? Girly is here! Not sisters no, just Girly and Green Boy. Girly that keeps saying that Girly knows that Big Elf should not leave. Girly told One she knows what being alone can do to people who want to be with others. Girly walked many moons East just to find Big Elf. If it isn't a story between Big Elf and Girly then what is it?" One stared at me with those twinkling glinting eyes and a crooked grin.

"There is nothing!" I nearly shout and grip my fists tightly.

"Stop lying to yourself Ever" a weak voice murmured. Jumping I turn to the limp and tired man laying next to me. "Why do you lie to yourself about how you feel? There is nothing wrong in feeling that way and you are being foolish".

"Freed enough! Please..." I felt trapped in a corner like a mouse against a giant cat. Except the cat is nothing but how I feel.

"You know he feels the same"

"Big Elf does? See Girly-"

"ENOUGH!" I shout. Wind whispers over the golden grass and silence lies over the campground and us three. "Freed..." I finally say. "You know more than anyone how difficult...How hard it is for me to-to be this way".

"The past is behind you Ever. When you stumbled across me and Laxus that night in the woods, it took awhile but you began to trust us. To tell us things, to be emotional. To let us be your family" Freed's dark eyes smiled slightly at me. "You felt no shame in learning to trust us. Don't feel shame in the feelings you have".

"I'm not ashamed about how I feel" I mutter and hid my face behind my hands again.

"Is that true?"

"I don't-" I take a shaky breath into my hands. "I do...I do know", _I know how I feel about you._ I know everything about how I feel, and never have I been ashamed. Only scared and that is it. "I was scared Freed. Never ashamed".

"Then you should tell him".

"Ha...Tell him, that is easier said than done. And we need to find him first" My hands shook and I kept them pressed close to me. Freed and One both looked pleased, I wonder if they understand how hard that was to say? "One, you saw him. Which way did he go?"

"Big Elf is like Green Boy and Girly! Big Elf followed water that way" One pointed down the length of the infinite creek. "One thinks Big Elf has left the long grass for bigger things..." One grinned and stood up. "Girly and Green Boy must go after him, but first One will show them how to hunt silly snakes!"

And so we learned. One taught me and Freed how to trap the hidden snakes that poisoned me. It's a miracle that we were never bit before! The snakes camouflage themselves so well into the earth and grass that it took the remained of the day for me and Freed to learn their patterns and how to safely trap them. They are skinny but long, a pale gray colour when you pull them up from the ground. And with large blunted fangs that retract at will... As the day aged I deliberately avoided any conversation about Elfman. I told them more or less how I feel about him...And yet I can't help but feel that I was forced into a corner and have been left little choice. If anything I feel more determination to find him then before, and yet I am also nervous at what will happen when we do. I lean down and bag a dead snake, a meal for another night and I remember the feel of a hand brushing down my temples and stroking my cheek. Closing my eyes, I almost feel them again and tremble slightly. It doesn't take much to see the gray eyes looking at me oddly in front of me. Obsessing over something is dangerous. Or _Someone_. And I can already tell that whatever the outcome of this search is I am going to look back at this moment, this (and I cringe now as I think it) _infatuation_ with disappointment in myself. Through my life I know pinning hopes and dreams on something out of reach is not only a waste of time but immature. And as much as I hate it...Elfman is out of reach. I have an idea of who he is at the moment and if he is alright. _He will come back...He will._

But will he? And that's that little nugget in my heart that tells me that he may never want to return. That I shouldn't count my chickens before they hatch. Yet what is the point of this journey if he never returns?

"Girly has been staring at the ground for very long time!"

I jolt and then relax slightly as I turn to One. "Just thinking about things..."

"Ah but thinking is just as dangerous as doing Girly" One tapped a temple. "Dangerous if you over think things. You can stray from the path you chose!" And now One stepped closer and placed a weathered hand on my brow. For some reason One's eyes caught the sun's light again and glinted like a dogs. It is only now that I realized that I have never seen One blink...

"One thinks Big Elf isn't the only one lost..."

* * *

 **It's late. IT'S LATE! And I can't be sorrier. But I will tell you something, right when I am about to hit 'publish' I will think of something and cut something out or replace another part. I have recycled this part over and over again until this copy right here. Take Ever's imaginary Elfman for example, I wrote that part over and over again and I'm still reluctant to leave that little fluffy part in there... Honestly writing One was hard too, but One has definitely become one of my favorite original characters. So read and review, comments are gold!**

 **Lots of love**

 **San-of-the-forest.**


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